“I’m 23, I hit for power, I’ve got plenty of room in my shirt, and I’m as Polish as a screen door on a submarine.”
“Yeah, we don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”
“Extra innings, god dammit. And I told th’ Wife I’d be home bly eleven.”
“You. You look like my brother. Mama always lovved heem the baste. He was head honcho weez de ladeez. Mama always said he was blessed.”
Musing upon the portrait of Joe Pettini, I am more confident in the hypothesis I developed for the entry on Dennis Leonard — that it takes a while for contemporary styles to penetrate the jockocracy. Not taking into account the eyeglass frames, Joe Pettini — in a 1981 picture — has perfected the ‘look’ prevalent in Boy Scout merit badge pamphlets published in the 1970’s. He could perhaps stand a touch of Groom & Clean, but I’ll bet Joe doesn’t like having a grimy green ring around his baseball-style cap.
“I’m Wilford Brimley, for the Montreal Expos. If you love Canadian bacon, you’ll like Canadian baseball. It’s the right thing to do and the right thing to….oh tush, my blood sugar’s low. Somebody else finish this.”
“Agent P, something something Doofenshmirtz. Something something stop him. Carl, bring me a muffin.”
The Doris Duke Tobacco Glob Gallery